“I Love You, It’s Not Quantum Physics, I Just Love You” ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ – D, 16th September 2007

(Photo of us at Lake District, England)

1649 days. That’s 2,374,560 minutes – and in this time, I cannot begin to count the number of times you’ve made me cry, but of this I’m sure: every single day you make me laugh. And for that, I Love You and I hope I’ll want to love you till my heart stops (or till you put a restraining order on me, whichever comes first!)

Happy Everyday-Is-Valentines-Day, my love x

From London, To Singapore

Jessie was in town over the weekend – a short stopover in Singapore on her way to Koh Samui – and it was so good to see her again after a whole year! We brought her for some local grub (famous chicken rice) and then settled into a chill afternoon at P.S. Cafe.

Over truffle fries & banana butterscotch, we filled each other in on the 12 months of absence – as it turns out: Jessie moved from London back to LA (her hometown) to Taiwan, and just recently moved in with her boo in Hong Kong- little miss jet setter. And Junny’s outdone herself (and us both, as usual) with her feature on Tatler’s Young Achievers. High time to up my game, get my act together.

Everything’s changed, but everyone’s still the same. Or maybe, everyone’s changed, but nothing’s different – just like old times. It was an amazing feeling, sitting with my girls, fondly remembering those 3 years of cold winter days, long morning classes, crazy nights out and Red Velvet cupcakes in the park. Till we’re together again, all my love xx

What looks like crazy on an ordinary day looks alot like love if you catch it in the moonlight

“And we danced too wild, and we sang too long, and we hugged too hard, and we kissed too sweet, and we threw back our heads and howled just as loud as we wanted to howl, because by now we were all old enough to know that what looks like crazy on an ordinary day looks a lot like love if you catch it in the moonlight.” 

Farewell For Now London, I’ll Miss You ♥

“If you’re tired of London, you’re tired of life”. Oh, if I had a penny for every time someone repeated those words to me… I’ve spent three homesick years wondering if indeed I was tired of life.

Three years have vanished since that fateful night I landed in the city; saluted by the omnipotent wind and rain, by those dark foreboding skies. Seasons have come and gone, but that’s not the only thing that’s changed.

In between tears and long distance phone calls, (and this may not come as a shock to you, but it definitely is to me), somewhere along the line, I fell in love with the secrets hidden deep within the cobbled streets of this city. The undisputedly biggest shopping street in Europe, the alcove of Korean restaurants hidden snugly behind it, the bright lights of Soho, the chapel in every corner, the weekend markets coming alive, hiding under my warm crusty duvet in my apartment by the park. Hours spent waiting for the 38 & 73 & C1; the expensive black cabs, the sadly smiling hobo by the Tesco’s across the street, the smell of dampness and the comforting shrills of the police sirens that never seem to cease, I have come to love them all.

And so I chose to spend my last my last night (in the city I have took so long to grudgingly call home) eating icecream and drinking bellinis, playing guessing games and cycling and somersaulting and laughing and freezing to death atop Primrose Hill soaking up the lovely view with some of the loveliest people.

Back in London & My Days Are Numbered.

I woke up this morning, and packed up three years of my life.

Unpaid council tax bills, that box of trinkets you sent me our first Valentines Day, an old DVD that only reminds me of the past, that cap you bought me in Las Vegas, the Harry Potter spectacles you won me at Coney Island. Unopened Tiffany’s box, post-it notes all over my walls, dried flowers from every time we argued.

Amidst receipts and postcards and to-do-lists, tacked up on the cork board:

1) Two girls laughing in a photo, secure in their differences, their fearless joy captured behind the lenses in a way only a candid can capture;

2) Two smiling faces posing for the camera, just another boy and girl, hiding broken souls.

3) Three generations of women, love and hate and history.

Sometimes the one you trust most implicitly end up cutting you the deepest, other times you’ll end up surprised that the one you almost let go ends up the one who saves you from yourself, ends up your everything. And then of course, there are times where some bonds are so deep, come hell or highwater, they just cannot be broken.

So there I was. My things clinically sorted: with any luck, packed into 23 indistinguishable brown FedEx boxes (and 3 luggages); otherwise, reluctantly but mercilessly thrown into big black thrash bags.

Three years of tears, frustration and laughter, of fear and insecurity, of euphoria and ecstasy. Three years of hatred and love, of self hatred and acceptance. Three years of soul-searching. Three whole years of my life.

A chapter closing, an another opening. Three years later, I’m not sure I know myself any better than I did before I blindly wandered into this journey. I’m not sure if I know any better what I want for the future, from myself, and the people in my life.

So I’m not quite sure what the future holds but this I do know: cheesy and naive as it may sound, I want to learn to be a better person (for me and for you) everyday, to take the time to find myself whatever that really means, and to stop and remember the smaller things in life. I want to live my life, not just to go through the motions, but to really live. Because the irony is that whilst graduation signifies some sort of coming of age, it’s also a poignant reminder that youth is fleeting, and I don’t want to let mine pass me by like trees from a moving car.

Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves like locked rooms and like books that are written in a very foreign tongue.  Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them.  And the point is, to live everything.  Live the questions now.  Perhaps you will find them gradually, without noticing it, and live along some distant day into the answer.

-Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet

PETRUS, by Gordon Ramsay.

Meeting the delightful Jean Phillipe

Roasted Beef Fillet with Braised Shin, baked Celeriac and Barolo sauce

Hola!

We’re on our way to Alicante on a coastal train from Barcelona right now, and I figured I’d post some random photos of when CJ was visiting London.

Supermarket shopping like responsible adults :)

Paul Van Dyk: Vandit 10th Anniversary

WIMBLEDON OPENING DAY 2010

Yen Hsun Lu, I was totally supporting him! Ranked 88 in the world currently, he’s unseated, but CHINESE!! WOO HOO!!!

My Feet Don’t Touch The Ground When I’m Around You

Cos you turn me upside down & around & around,
Turn me upside down & around & around.

My feet don’t touch the ground when I’m around you,
When I’m around you you you you you.